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Showing posts from April, 2012

A is for Asshole –or– I Don't Care That Your Kid Can Say The Alphabet

It seems like a lot of parents of toddlers biggest pride is their kid can recite the ABCs... They strut out like a trained seal and say "Say your alphabet."

I've been accosted by these alphabet spewing kids too many times to count... And it's freaking annoying. I feel like they're trying yo impress me... I feel like I should reach into my pocket and throw some spare change in the kid's hat... Too bad none threw one down before hand.

It means absolutely nothing. It's memorization. It's a song. A mnemonic but really it's a completely... Not like counting.

But I think parents feel that because their kid can say their alphabet that they are changing the diapers of the next Einstein.

This post isn't just about me bitching... Although I felt I had to throw that in so you all can spare the world of having to hear it...

It's about the other morning when MF was playing with his magnet letters... He knows a fair amount of them and Staci was working o…

I was going to write something else but this takes precedence.

We went looking for bikes yesterday... His legs are so super tiny that even most balance bikes are too small... Luckily if he grows about an inche he'll be able to ride the smallest Novara kid's bike...

But he was a bit bummed that he couldn't buy a bike... And so was I... And this crappy little skateboard was only $18 (in reality I'd never buy a regular board or bike from anywhere than a board or bike store. Toy and Big box store gear sucks).

We took it home...

He's still too young for this, can't balance while kicking and doesn't get the idea of kicking... But damn he loves it... It was his chair at the snack table this morning...

Freaking High School Kids

Since I can't get to sleep until it's quite late I find myself watching movies at night since post-prime time television kind of sucks... I should also mention that late used to mean 2 or 3 in the AM but now with the kid and my age it means midnight...

And I should mention that midnight is 12:00 which means it's actually morning... People always say things like "I need that by midnight tonight". There are two things wrong with that... People don't often say that and midnight would have already passed.

That being said an unnamed online streaming company keeps me entertained... Unnamed because they kind fo suck now that they spun off their DVD service and that they are now less concerned with streaming movies than TV shows even though 'flix' is in the name of the company.

Any how I find myself watching a lot of documentaries because real life is often more entertaining and less believable than scripts.

That's how I found myself watching a movie call…

Killing It With A Joke

I'm killing the blog... Kind of...

It all comes down to time and energy really... And while I love writing on this blog I don't feel that I have the time to write really good stuff anymore... And there are a shit load of sites out there with really crappy stuff on them and I don't want to add to the noise...

On a side note I find it odd that some of those sites with crappy stuff are quite popular... But I suppose one dog's crap is another dog's meal. I learned this lesson this morning as my dog was chomping on another dog's poo while leaving a little gift of her own on the lawn. The circle of life.

And I'm not totally killing it... I'll try to write one post a week and post it on Monday but if I have nothing good to say I won't post.

I have a few good posts in my head already so I know this isn't the last.

And I promised a joke so here it goes... kind of... It's the first joke MF told.

The setup: Staci was reading MF a book called Switching …